Forget Die Hard & Gremlins: Alternative Christmas Movies To Watch in 2020

Having spent some time Googling for alternative holiday viewing picks this year, it became apparent that there is a real lack of lists that aren't the same-old same-old. Listen, I love Die Hard and Gremlins too! It's just a major stretch to call these movies underrated or overlooked in any way, especially when they come up like clockwork every year as so-called ‘alternatives.’ So I figured I should take matters into my own hands and list off some off-the-beaten path flicks that either deal with the holidays/Christmas specifically–or at least capture some snowy vibes for your viewing pleasure.

The Christmas Martian aka Le martien de Noël (1971), dir. Bernard Gosselin

Synopsis: A martian arrives at a small town in Quebec and becomes friends with the local children. He gives them candy to get the children into his spacecraft, which alarms the parents. Eventually he wins them over and they have a great big Christmas party.

Here's some pure, unfiltered Canadian WTF-worthy spiked maple syrup for you; two kids run afoul of the titular "martian" (just a Canadian comedian bundled up in a big coat with fishnets over his face) and end up on his spaceship, eating space candy. They also fly around for a while, and eventually have a big party with the locals. It's absolutely bizarre, but equally as fascinating. A true piece of Canadian history that you should probably experience for yourself–gather the whole family for The Christmas Martian!

Comfort and Joy (1984), dir. Bill Forsyth

Synopsis: Radio host Alan ‘Dickie’ Bird witnesses an ice cream van attacked and destroyed by angry competitors. This leads him into the struggle between two Italian families over the ice cream market of Glasgow.

Bill Forsyth's Housekeeping was one of my favourite personal discoveries of the year, so of course I was going to check in with his kind-of Christmas movie. While Comfort and Joy takes a while to get going, and features the patented entering-the-finale-lull, but it definitely gets there and ends on a really great note.

It's the story of a Radio DJ who's girlfriend of four years takes off unexpectedly (like, doesn't tell him until the moving trucks are there); he soldiers on, and ultimately becomes embroiled between rival ice cream truck companies who make him their go-between. Meanwhile, his bosses think he's going nuts with all his conspiracy-type talk at the end of his radio show.

This all sounds more eventful than it actually is, in true Forsyth fashion it's very low-key and subtly hilarious.

The poster tries to skew further towards the Christmas tone than the actual movie (he never drives around with a tree on his car that I recall) but it's a very charming picture with great performances and cast that ends on a nice note.

D.O.A. (1988), dir. Annabel Jankel & Rocky Morton

Synopsis: Dexter Cornell, an English Professor becomes embroiled in a series of murders involving people around him. Dexter has good reason to want to find the murderer but hasn’t much time. He finds help and comfort from one of his student, Sydney Fuller.

This remake of the neo-noir classic (from the filmmaking duo who went on to direct Super Mario Bros) is exactly the kind of overbaked, ambitious mess that I absolutely love. It's a shame how they were basically blacklisted after the Mario fiasco, because they direct the hell out of this movie and I wish we could have more films from them. In D.O.A., Dennis Quaid is poisoned by someone (there'a about a million red herrings) and he has about 24-48 hours to figure out what's going on before he dies. It's an expectedly twisted affair, and it takes place during the sweatiest, most sweltering and alcohol/cigarette-soaked Christmas you'll ever see on film. The most unfortunate thing about the picture is the forced romance between Quaid's professor character and Meg Ryan's student - gross power dynamics abound - but otherwise it's a lot of fun.

Iced (1988), Dir. Jeff Kwitny

Synopsis: A group of childhood friends are invited to the opening of a posh ski resort, unaware that an old nemesis has murderous plans in mind for them.

Not technically a Christmas film, Iced is a snowbound, low-budget slasher about murders at a ski resort. There's a real weird "spent the budget on cocaine" charm to this lame slasher; the late-80s fashion, drab cinematography and awkward skiing scenes oddly make up for some of the pacing slack. The kills aren't anything to write home about, and it seems more interested in getting random scenes of nudity in, but there's a je ne sais quoi here that made this all very entertaining to me. Don't even get me started on the ridiculously funny final shot. :chef kiss emoji:

Beat Street (1984) dir. Stan Lathan

Synopsis: An aspiring DJ from the south Bronx and his best friend, a promoter, try to get into show business by exposing people to hip-hop music and culture.

With Beat Street, you not only get a Santa Rap, but you are also served up a perfect vision of snowy New York, extended 10+ minute breakdance scenes, and phenomenal music. This is another one on the list where the holiday vibes maybe aren't laid on as thick as you might expect, but the aforementioned rap really pushes it over the top. It's also just a fantastic snapshot of a specific era in music history and for that, it's a must-see (even with some pretty yikes-worthy dated moments, lyrically.)

Blood Beat (1983), dir. Fabrice A. Zaphiratos

Synopsis: A woman who lives in deer-hunting country in rural Wisconsin is possessed by the spirit of a Japanese samurai warrior.

I don't think you can deny a movie as out-there as this one; you could call Blood Beat boring, confusing, weird, or more–and you'd be right–but it's so bonkers, so (seemingly) intentionally impenetrable that it ultimately just becomes a complete and total original. The "plot" follows a group who come together at a cabin in rural Wisconsin for some holiday deer-hunting, but are rudely interrupted by the spirit of a Japanese samurai. A hazy, psychedelic VHS vision beamed down from who-knows-where; Merry Christmas!

Exit Speed (2008), dir. Scott Ziehl

Synopsis: On Christmas Eve, ten strangers board a bus traveling across Texas and are forced off the road by a motorcycle gang. The passengers then take refuge in an abandoned scrap yard. When their defense against the gang weakens and their numbers dwindle they must do the unthinkable go on the offense.

I rented Exit Speed in 2008, expecting almost nothing from the movie and enjoyed it thoroughly. Was it low expectations? Maybe, but this Christmas Eve based siege thriller got straight to the point and entertained me more than your average DTV actioner, replete with solid action, explosions and shootouts. I had pretty much forgotten about it though, until Justin Decloux logged it again on Letterboxd in 2019 and jogged my memory. If anyone knows what’s up, it’s Justin! This movie is definitely ripe for rediscovery with a mere 177 views on Letterboxd.

Stone Cold Dead (1979), dir. George Mendeluk

Synopsis: Sergeant Boyd’s police search to find a sniper who has been shooting prostitutes.

Canadian maple sleaze that takes the police procedural/giallo to the great white north; Stone Cold Dead is the kind of thriller that meanders about–the black-gloved killer with a sniper rifle strikes so infrequently that for stretches you almost forget about it–but the vibe is sleazy, the ‘70s funk and melodramatic orchestration is laid on thick. Throw in Paul Williams overacting plus the grimy Toronto atmosphere and locations and you’ve got a deal.

A low-key, hang out in the gutter, winter-bound Peeping Tom meets detective thriller for the Labatt 50 set.

Santabear’s High Flying Adventure (1987), dir. Michael Sporn & Robert Marianetti

Synopsis (via Curtis on Letterboxd): Santa dispatches his young friend Santabear to act as a missionary to the South Pole, preaching the word of Xmas and giving gifts, because no one at the South Pole believes in Christmas. A high flying adventure ensues.

Bizarrely mounted animated short with John Malkovich as Santa and Bobby McFerrin in dual roles as the titular Santabear and his arch nemesis; the dialogue is stilted and made even more weird by the plainfaced vocal performances (or in some cases, non-performances). Still, there's some kind of oddball charm to it that kept me interested–which makes it a good alternative to your tried-and-true classics.

Dead Bang (1989), dir. John Frankenheimer

Synopsis: A man kills a storekeeper and a cop on Christmas Eve, and Los Angeles homicide detective Jerry Beck gets the case. The investigation takes Beck inside the violent world of hate groups and white supremacists, who are hatching a deadly plot to attack even more innocent people.

Frankenheimer followed up the sleazy and wonderful 52-Pick Up with Dead Bang, a workmanlike thriller about a cop (played by Miami Vice's Don Johnson) who is tracking down a cop-killing member of a small but deadly group of white supremacists.

I’d say this is dialed back from Frankenheimer’s previous film only slightly, because we're still left room for Johnson to accidentally barf on a perp after chasing him down while nursing a hangover. The final showdown has squibs-a-plenty, and there's a solid explosion in an earlier shoot-out.

Back when I first watched this in 2016, I felt it was a lesser film than 52-Pick Up, but it’s not quite fair to compare the two. Over the years, Dead Bang has become something of a minor favourite of mine–it’s certainly a little overlooked in the action genre in general, not just for being Christmas-related!

Prancer (1989), dir. John D. Hancock

Synopsis: Jessica, the daughter of an impoverished apple farmer, still believes in Santa Claus. So when she comes across a reindeer with an injured leg, it makes perfect sense to her to assume that it is Prancer, who had fallen from a Christmas display in town. Her father finds the reindeer an decides to sell it to the butcher, not for venison chops, but as an advertising display.

Probably the most popular/well-known film to grace this list, but having seen Prancer for the first time this year and falling in love with it, I just couldn't make this post without including it. John D. Hancock's film is as magical as it is unrelentingly depressing; this tale of a young girl, her struggling apple-farmer father, and the reindeer who might just be Prancer absolutely won me over. I couldn't believe that this movie isn't kept in high regard, because it's a masterpiece in my eyes. Oh, and bring some tissues because: Niagara Falls, Frankie Angel.

One Magic Christmas (1985), dir. Phillip Borsos

Synopsis: Ginny Grainger, a young mother, rediscovers the joy and beauty of Christmas, thanks to the unshakable faith of her six-year-old daughter Abbie and Gideon, Ginny’s very own guardian angel.

Maybe the best small town Ontario Christmas vibe captured on film? Mary Steenburgen plays a mother with some incredibly bleak luck (she loses her job, can’t afford anything for Christmas this year, and to add insult-to-injury her husband is straight-up shot) but it’s OK because Harry Dean Stanton as Clarence the Angel is on the case. Things get incredibly dark in One Magic Christmas for some, probably overbearingly so, but that’s exactly what makes this an interesting pick for the holiday season personally. Would pair well with Prancer as a feel-bad Christmas double feature.

’R Xmas (2001), dir. Abel Ferrara

Synopsis: A New York drug dealer is kidnapped, and his wife must try to come up with the money and drugs to free him from his abductors before Christmas.

This is one of those movies that I dug on vibe alone; so sparse it's practically a tone-poem by way of Cassavetes. Scenes that would be key for other films (such as the kidnapping that kicks off the plot about 45 minutes into the movie) are almost entirely brushed over initially in ‘R Xmas. Meanwhile, there's extended scenes of cocaine preparation in great detail - the bags are stamped, money counted, drugs weighed; it's practically an ASMR video. “Let it snow,” indeed. Despite this, it’s surprisingly engaging in the way it sets this personal, small-scale crime tale within the larger political landscape of a New York City that has Giuliani looming just over the horizon.